I constantly consciously try to keep a cleanly conscience It keeps me grounded in reality when the rapture is upon us What I believe in I'll defend til my demise And if all the strong defenders of their ethics drop like flies, that's how I'll die So try try as you may to lead my companions astray I know the feelings that youre feeling theyre just not properly conveyed You're a starving unpaid actor standing barefoot in the rain And you're phrasing your words perfectly to try to counteract the pain So whaddaya say The wires are exploding as they fray I've got plenty pieces of the past just piling on my plate And I'll never really come to terms with this purgatory state When the sour disposition I've wound up with starts to take I plunge down in the ice cold water I dive into the ice cold lake Can you empathize with anything at all? How long will you remain in power how long how long Cause I've been walking right by your side and it's been hell even getting this far Oh your demons are darker than I imagined from the start Oh your demons are darker than I imagined from the start Apologize for this apocalypse that's all that I ask For all this torment and torture I just want something back (x4)

Am I escaping conviction? Or am I stuck in a mental prison? A greater pain than the pain you have experienced Do I belong in a psych ward? I heard you screaming, I saw you fight, but Within my brain your pain's not all that serious They're grasping at straws when it comes to the detail For all I involved, I'm sorry I sold you in to this I'm stupid and selfish and probably facing imprisonment and I might take my own life depending on how long the sentence is Behind bars, I'm begging you to spare me I am the headline, a horrible man I am the headline, I'm a horrible man I am the headline, I am the headline I am the headline, yea I am the exile and I'm on a high speed chase down Sunset Boulevard They took me in for questioning My friends they all won't say a thing They know what they got into from the start

I'm alone in the wilderness I am confined within the space I was provided with A shaded shelter filled with shedding skin I was betrayed by all the people I confided in Drain the life from me like a vacuum for my blood and body The walls are closing in on this death trap I'm sorry I'm on a desert island I'm dying from dehydration And I've sent out smoke signals but I'm running out of patience I am an inanimate object in the scheme of things My harsh reality prevented me from dreaming big I am a black and white photo held by a broken frame If I'm not content then I'll just continue wandering So cut me off if you insist I won't take part in all of this I tried Access denied I'm armed and dangerous I'm balled up in a strangers fist Exposed I'm dying slow Give me a few months to fry my brain up I think I left a part of me in Pennsylvania perhaps And that's another reason why I'm never looking back It was fleeting too quickly to catch

Started swimming my way to the center I've been playing to my pleasure receptors I've been pardoning people for their behavior I'm somewhere between a sellout and a savior My days a series of carefully planned distractions Deep thoughts and slightly delayed reactions All of these marks on my skin are burns and scratches Everything is so much better in my absence I feel so unappreciated for my absence And I pull myself apart providing people access And I lose opportunities because I'm anxious And it's been twenty years and I still can't fully grasp it What's the arbitrary value of my ashes 'Cause I'm ninety nine percent sure life if filled with nonsense And if I have to kill myself to clear my conscience I'll put the awful parts about me up for auction Lazy and lonely for the long-term Heart burn I think I took the wrong turn And frankly I'm confused by my surroundings, but I've found things to keep me grounded I'm unprepared and unadjusted Slowly been betrayed by all the people that I trusted Can't wait 'till the day that the universe does me justice It could be days, it could be months, it could be hundreds I never quite knew how to deal with pain well That's why I spent the last two years destroying all my brain cells I'm walking on a narrow path of needles, pins, and eggshells And I can feel my spirit leave my body when I exhale I can communicate with those beyond the grave 'Cause honestly I've died a bit over the years myself in many ways I am a pessimistic particle of hate No, I'm not the type of person you should talk to everyday Swam as fast as I could, but now it's over A simple man with a stomach of a soldier There were casualties, maybe hundreds in total I'll let them know I'm the one who slit their throat I feel so unappreciated for my absence And I pull myself apart providing people access And I lose opportunities because I'm anxious And its been twenty years and I still can't fully grasp it What's the arbitrary value of my ashes 'Cause I'm ninety nine percent sure life if filled with nonsense And if I have to kill myself to clear my conscience I'll put the awful parts about me up for auction I never quite knew how to deal with pain well That's why I spent the last two years destroying all my brain cells I'm walking on a narrow path of needles, pins, and eggshells And I can feel my spirit leave my body when I exhale I can communicate with those beyond the grave I can communicate with those beyond the grave I can communicate with those beyond the grave, with those beyond the grave

I'm not a mercenary no not for anybody I'm out of patience out of time and out of money It starts off good, and then turns bad and just gets ugly I'm sad and selfish but somehow the people love me I don't mind making a fool of myself in public At times I'm not a person and I'm more of just a puppet I can just be quiet now or continue to cause an upset Oh but I'm the usual suspect, yea I'm the usual suspect I am a carry on bag I'm always hanging over peoples heads Hovering in the background like a holographic projection This see-through scenery's like salt in my wounds And I know they sent me off to war but I'm coming home soon Quickly escalating into chaos Burning through me like an acid rain drop I sometimes see myself as Satan when I'm startled And that's not something that you wanna be a part of But as far as I can see there's no escaping I am a hero with a gunshot wound that's gaping So to pretend that I'm deriving some enjoyment I'll do cartwheels as I'm carrying these corpses, yea I'll turn around turn tombstones into torches Layers won't lighten the impact almost at all The glue that held me together is definitely gone And it's a long hard cold road onward The chattering is constant It's all just completely nonsense to me anyway Quickly escalating into chaos Burning through me like an acid rain drop I sometimes see myself as satan when I'm startled And that's not something that you wanna be a part of But as far as I can see there's no escaping I am a hero with a gunshot wound that's gaping So to pretend that I'm deriving some enjoyment I'll do cartwheels as I'm carrying these corpses, yea I'll turn around turn tombstones into torches One more time television static tearing through my ears Young and confused again my eyes are streaming tears I am an idiot who's wise beyond his years And causing harm is not the reason that I'm here Causing harm is not the reason that I'm here The reason that I'm here The reason that I'm here

The mind of a maniac can become a murder weapon I'm believing whatever I'm told cause I don't want myself or my clients to be misrepresented I thought about ending it here But they're eagerly watching It just gets so exhausting to calm myself knowing they're constantly calling your name to the stand Why would you incarcerate the captives We are living our lives at 110 degrees Where's the testimony where's the target Forced to fight for a terrible cause If we're not in hell then I don't know where we are Is this probable cause for a search I know in my head that he did it but money comes first Will he be left in charge of his kids? I can't say that I would be able to sleep if he is and I know that I'm putting their lives at risk by leaving them with him And I know its my job and I shouldn't get involved but I just can't live with the guilt Why would you incarcerate the captives? Why would you incarcerate the captives? The very captives calling out to me

I put a gun to my head, to try and break my mind 'Cause I'm taking more control, I guess I'm taking more control I put a knife to your tongue, to make you stop telling me that you love me, love me again So save your breath, 'cause I can't stand the smell of your cigarettes Save my life, 'cause I can't save it myself I've got a six-pack of beer in my trunk Oh god I hope I don't crash my car tonight Jesse find a cure Get me high I will endure All your secrets to pretend I look cool and composed, but yet I crumble inside almost every time So keep your forked tongue behind your teeth Let's just keep this between you and me I've got a six-pack of beer in my trunk Oh god I hope I don't crash my car tonight Jesse find a cure Get me high I will endure All your secrets to pretend Your legs are smooth as your body lies on mine I'll take these secrets as a lie Cause I can't stand the smell of your cigarettes

Suddenly I'm suffering Something that no ones understanding A hibernation for the fall Bury your heads, don't speak at all Why do my green eyes see gruesome things that go away every time I blink? The hollow ghost of a better time The candle burns in my melting mind I left my prized possession in the pouring rain A black hole depression in my burning brain Now we're all defiant drinking wine in silence I'm a diamond cut from dying dandelions Cut the wings, I killed a monster Fell and crushed my spine Rotton fruit with an empty core I've got no backbone anymore Come here you ungrateful bastards Don't break each others' necks There's only peace when there's nothing said Trading this comfort for nothingness Cardbord cutout We're animated pressed into a lie Tape shut our mouths Prevent the truth from coming into light Its coursing through my body like its lightning

The screams, they echo through the stained glass and the wind chimes Just block it all out, chase it all down with bottles of red wine I'm a man who cant speak, a man who's thoughts don't even matter, I'm shattering slowly beneath I'm the stone that they cast and left me wherever I landed to fall on my ass Partially paralyzed, plagued as a pet I've dealt with disaster, I'm not dying yet And my family has all but abandoned me, I guess Strapped to this chair at the hip we're attached Clinging to life by the end of a raft I've got a gun in my drawer so I know there's an easier path And it's quite the opposite of that Oh it's quite the opposite of that I feel like an animal chained up in torment As I reach for my cane, I scream out in pain and I'm beaten and scolded And the more that I drink, the more that I think I can't bare to grow old here Halfway across the world, yea I traveled my whole life and ended up nowhere Oh I may be leg-locked but I can still think With a pistol in hand and some bourbon to drink As she led him upstairs, oh I cried to their footsteps So don't be deceitful on my dying day You probably laughed as you watched my legs break I saw a man in your bed and had a dream about kicking his ass And its quite the opposite of that oh its quite the opposite of that I needed to communicate somehow That it's killing me slowly just being in this house It's a race to the end, it's a matter of which route Yea I'm old and I'm scared and I'm tired and sick now But its quite the opposite of that yea its quite the opposite of that

Every time I face my fears, it blows up in my face From that day on, I knew that I'd be dying in this place A holding cell, this grave I dug deliberately deep These thoughts of failure keep me captive, haunt me in my sleep I promise I don't want to die this life is all I know I'm just immature as fuck and I need some time to grow This stressful situation creates tension in my wrists So I walk these empty streets with a blunt between my cold dead lips Factory pressed to be the best I don't quite fit the model I'm slowly becoming obsessed 'Cause this sadness seems perpetual And I've made myself a vegetable And it's really nice to meet you, oh I'm so glad I met you all Got many people you can call Who will make sure I'm miserable 'Cause this fucked up world just can't accept me as an individual Starved of recognition, I'm a joke, a fraud, a one hit wonder I'm just delirious from all the pressure that I'm under I am a sorry, sour soul but my worst fear aren't tangible Just going through the motions, daily life feels so mechanical Stand as still as a statue, as I watch from the backroom Petrified with fear it almost feels like I have to It feels like I'm on house arrest, 'cause my world's a fucking mess And I've got to make my mark before I fade to nothingness because, I view this world from different angles, with this bracelet on my ankle And when I try to speak I choke, its almost like I'm being strangled I am a prisoner of war who's not sure what he's fighting for I am the jealousy and hatred you ignore, so fall to the floor